A Scintillating Conversation

As she does most Sunday mornings, my mom called. After engaging in a pleasant conversation with her and then with my dad, I asked to talk to my little brother, Joseph. Joseph has his hands in a lot of cookie jars right now, including, but not limited to, piano, Taekwondo, choir, and art. I know what you're thinking. Joseph is awesome.

Anyway, as our conversation progressed, the topic turned to Taekwondo. Joseph twisted his ankle the day before his test to become a blue belt. But, like a real trooper, he pressed forward and passed the test with flying colors. I asked him if he was going to keep going to get his black belt, he said, "No. My mom said I could quit after I got my blue belt. I'm only doing it so I can beat the crap out of [insert name of Joseph's mortal enemy]."

Well, as long as his motives are pure.

I then asked if he was going to take on Lewis when he came out here for a visit. Our conversation went something like this (Lewis was beside me, telling me some of the things to say):

Me: So are you going to try and beat the crap out of Lewis when you come visit us?

Joseph: Yeah.

Me: Are you sure? Lewis is a black belt.

Joseph: Well I already beat a black belt.

Me: But Lewis is also a ninja. A black belt ninja.

Joseph: That's not true. Ninja's don't have belts.

Me: How do you know?

Joseph: I've seen a ninja in real life.

Me: Of course you did, at our wedding! It was Lewis.

Joseph: No, it wasn't Lewis! I saw a real ninja and he wasn't wearing a belt. I also played a ninja video game.

Me: Yeah! That game was based off of Lewis!

Joseph: No it's not. Lewis is not a turtle. Or a rat.

Me: Okay, that's true. Lewis is not a turtle or a rat.

Joseph: I wish he was a rat.

Me: Why?

Joseph: Then I could kill him.

In short, Lewis had better watch his back.