You know that song they sing at the end of "A Muppet Family Christmas" when all the Sesame Street gang and Fraggle Rock chumps are there? The "Happy Holidays" one? Well, when ever I say "Happy Mother's Day," I hear it in my head to the tune of "Happy Holidays." It's weird.
Welcome, dear readers, to the goings-on of my head.
Anyway, I wanted to give a shout out to all those madres out there cause, basically, y'all are the bomb-diggity. Especially my mom. For shiz, yo.
But seriously, as far as moms go, mine is the bee's knees. She's always been there for me, ain't no mountain high nor valley low nor river wide enough, baby, to keep her from getting to me. The wonders of the interwebs help cause they allow us to speak on the phone whenever we want.
Here are 10 things that make my mom cooler than yours:
1. She's ridden an ostrich.
2. She raised four kids, and when they were almost all grown, went back for one more. He keeps her young.
3. She let me skip school to go to the movies with her cause she didn't want to go with just Joseph.
4. She knows more about Star Trek than anyone I know. That's important now, cause of the new movie being so awesome.
5. Her dessert fetched the most out of anyone's dessert at our "Pay-for-Girls'-Camp Dessert Auction."
6. She says Joseph is the king of multitasking, but I think I know where he learned it from. She catches up on her reading while she does her hair and make-up. I still haven't figured out how.
7. She's a great example to me of service. She just cares about peeps.
8. Her favorite character in Star Wars: Episode 1 is Darth Maul, because his make-up looks so cool. Her favorite character in the Lord of the Rings is Legolas, because he's dreamy. Orlando Bloom is just okay.
9. She can read "Fox in Socks" faster than anyone. No, really. Try and challenge her.
10. She loves her family so much. You think about the most you've ever loved anyone and add a billion. That's how much she loves all of us. And you can take that to the bank.
Happy Mother's Day, Momsie. I love you lots and lots. And lots.
Of course, I can't close a Mother's Day post without also mentioning my mother-in-law. This is the first Mother's Day when she's been my mother-in-law, after all. You know how people complain about their mothers-in-law, like, all the time? Take, for example, the mom in Everybody Loves Raymund. Well, my mother-in-law is nothing like that. You'd think that, with a mom as awesome as mine, I'd have filled my quota as far as mothers go and I'd end up with a crappy mother-in-law. This is not the case. Pretty much, my mother-in-law could beat up your mother-in-law.
No, really. She's the best. She takes such good care of Lewis and me. All the time. She lets us come over whenever we want. Really. One of my favorite places to hang out is at my in-laws' house. How many people can say that? More than anything, she wants to see all of her children succeed. She loves and cares about all of them so much and just wants the best for them. That's something you can feel, not just know.
Moral of the story? You should be jealous of me and my super sweet moms.