Tuesday, January 24, 2012

I'll Never Be a Model

If there is anything that having a baby has taught me, it's this: I suck at walking.

I sort of already knew that, in so much that I am really clumsy.  One need only look at the bruises that currently adorn both my shins to understand that.  I've been fortunate that I haven't maimed or otherwise injured my child due to my penchant for the klutz.  Yet.

But it goes beyond that.  Overall, I'm just bad at walking.  Maybe I missed a lesson in my toddler years or something.

I realized this last night when I was trying to put Jack to bed.  We are still working on the whole self-soothe-fall-asleep-on-your-own deal.  It's not going well.  So most nights he falls asleep while I'm feeding him or holding him and then I will ever so carefully gather him into my arms, creep over to his room, and deposit him in his crib.  Sometimes we only have to do this once.  Sometimes this process repeats itself.  Several times.

Last night as I was carrying him to bed, I noticed that every time I stepped with my right foot, it jiggled him.  I totally step on it weird and it jostles whatever cargo is on my person.  This is super awesome at two in the morning when I'm trying to put my little pip into his bed.  Not.

Lewis has mentioned before that I have a somewhat heavy gait.  I wasn't sure what to think of that.  All I knew was that it didn't seem very feminine or wifely.  But it's true!  I walk like I weigh 300 pounds!  And Jack's sleep (and mine, for that matter) has suffered the consequences.

I never thought that was something I needed to fix.  But here we are.  No wonder Jack never seems to get enough sleep.

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