Dear girl sitting at the table across from me,
You don't bug me, but if I can clearly make out the lyrics to the song you are listening to on your iPod from all the way over here, you might want to reconsider the volume you've selected. Seriously.
Honestly, we'd all win if you did that. No one in this room would be subjected to your annoying teenybopper cheese fest anymore and you would save yourself from going deaf in the next five years. And I'd have one less thing to complain about!
Thanks. You're a pal.