Wednesday, October 7, 2009

I Never Knew I Used My Middle Finger So Much...

... Until I couldn't use it anymore.

Okay, that's not entirely true. I can use it. It just hurts.

You see, I jammed it yesterday in PE (that's right, I'm taking a PE class). In truth, I should have seen it coming. We were playing basketball, and I always hurt at least one finger playing basketball (that's not an exaggeration). I hit the ball funny while I was stealing it from someone else in the course of a game, said "Frick" because it hurt, and wondered if my "Frick" sounded like another yet more vulgar expletive that starts with the letter F based on the look on the face of the girl from whom I stole the ball. Anyway, it swelled up all day yesterday until it was a great big fatty fat fat with some gross looking coloration.

I figured it was no big deal, it's just the middle finger, and on my left hand no less! The only real function my left hand has is for eating, and I can use my right hand for that no problem.

That's when I remembered the fact that I am an avid laptop in that I use it to take all my notes at school. And that's when I discovered how very much involved the middle finger on my left hand is in the typing process. Taping and/or splinting the finger was suddenly out of the question (tried it... didn't work and I had a paper to type).

So, yeah, it hurts when I type. I'm sure you are all now wondering why on earth I am bothering to blog at this time if I am in such pain. Well, why don't I tell you?

You.

It's all for you, my dear readers. Because I know you're out there. I do. I have Google Analytics.

To be honest, it's not actually that bad. Typing my paper yesterday sucked, it's true, but my finger is lots better today. It's still a great big fatty fat fat and it still doesn't bend all the way, but it doesn't hurt nearly as much. Just when I bend it or straighten it all the way. Plus, most of the gross coloration has cleared up. No biggie, yo.

I think it would have been funny if the ring finger on my left hand got hurt instead of the middle. Then maybe I would get my wedding ring stuck on it, and it would look all unattractive and weird. I don't know why that idea amuses me, but there you go. It would be a yin-yang of aesthetics with a pretty ring on a elephantine finger. El oh freaking el.

Here's what my finger looks like right now. I think the best part is that it's only the middle knuckle that's swollen, so the whole finger looks kind of like a large body with a really small head. You know the type.
The other side where only a small semblance of the gross coloration remains.

2 comments:

Mitzi said...

Ouch! That looks like it hurts bad.

My brother once threw a hard pass to me and catching it tore a ligament in my thumb. Sucked.

elsalgal said...

I did the same thing to my finger playing softball at debate camp one year. Yeah, I'm a geek.

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