Tents for Tables

One of the less fun and more gross aspects of my job is my responsibility over the advertising that goes on the tables in the terrace of the Wilkinson Student Center. The advertising is in the form of clear plastic table tents that can hold up to six fliers at a time.

You're probably thinking, "That doesn't sound gross, Alyssa. You're just a baby." But, no. Believe me. It's gross.

You see, during the day, the terrace is used as an extension of the Cougareat, BYU's food court. People come to the terrace, sit down at tables and enjoy greasy burritos from Taco Bell or messy sandwiches from Subway. As they eat, they can enjoy the various advertisements in my table tents. And they can touch my table tents with their oily and sticky fingers. And spill nasty orange, brown, or blue drinks all over my table tents. And stick their nasty rubbish inside my table tents. And sometimes break my table tents.

I've been working at this job for three years now (almost exactly). When I started, I had between 60 and 70 table tents. 50 can go in the terrace at any given time. Now, three years later, I'm down to 19. A bit pathetic, right?

I don't have an explanation for the disappearance of all my table tents. I do know that several have broken, but not 51 of them. My only theory is thievery. People (freshmen, likely) have thieved my table tents. Why? Beats me. I just explained that they are gross.

A typical Friday for me consists of the following.
1. Search for a cart.
2. Take the cart to the terrace.
3. Track down all the table tents.
4. Load the table tents on to the cart.
5. Bring the table tents back to my desk.
6. Remove all the trash from the table tents (I've seen everything, from twist ties to lolly pop sticks)
7. Remove all the unauthorized fliers from the table tents.
8. Remove all the outdated fliers from the table tents.
9. Put in the new fliers from the table tents.
10. Soak my hands in sanitizer.
11. (Only if I'm particularly annoyed) track down the person/group who stuck unauthorized fliers in the table tents and tell them they can't do that and if they would like to advertise in the table tents, they must schedule them with me.

Sometimes I genuinely dread table tent time on Friday. And by sometimes, I mean always. They are just so, so gross.

But now - oh now! - it's all changed. At least for a few weeks. You see, I just received a shipment of brand new, crystal clean table tents. Finally, all the tables in the terrace will once again have a tent. I'm actually kind of excited to go pick up the table tents tomorrow evening (the terrace closes on Tuesdays for Club Night) so I can add the new ones to the rotation.

The sad truth of the matter is, I halfway don't even want to put these new table tents out. I know exactly what is going to happen to them out there. It's a crazy and gross place. And these ones are so pretty and so clean.

Ah, well. I still have my trusty, jumbo-sized bottle of hand sanitizer.