Friday, December 5, 2008

Peeple R Stoopid!

Tuesday morning.
10:45.
Class has ended.
Work starts at 11.
I head in that direction.
It's cold outside.
I wish I could cut through the bookstore.
It's closed.
Devotional is about to start.
I go around the side of the building instead.

In understanding this concept, I am in the minority.

Seriously, every Tuesday morning at 10:45, I see a flock of people standing in front of the Bookstore doors, pulling on the handles, trying to get in. And it makes me wonder, how did these people get into college? Because even if they can read, they seem to lack skills in reading comprehension. Which is a very integral part of higher education. They also appear to have collective problems with their memories.

You see, every Tuesday morning at 10:45, campus shuts down. It's devotional time. Almost everything is closed to A). encourage students to go to devotional and B). give student employees the opportunity to go to devotional. Among the campus entities that shut down at this time is the BYU Bookstore. Yes, every Tuesday morning at 10:45, the Bookstore closes. They lock the doors and they put up signs that say "Closed." Seems pretty clear, right? And yet, every Tuesday morning at 10:45, students still try to get into the Bookstore. And it's the same students! I've seem them at it! The same people every week! Do they each have something in their weekly routine that causes them to collectively lose their memory of the events that occurred on Tuesday morning at 10:45? I don't know. It's a mystery.

More than likely, they're just stupid. It's like they have a never-failing hope that maybe this Tuesday morning at 10:45 will be different, maybe the Bookstore will be open this time. I admire their tenaciousness. They never back down, never give up. They must have a very optimistic outlook on life, giving the Bookstore the benefit of the doubt as they go back there every Tuesday morning at 10:45 to try, the idiots.

I can't even pretend to understand about them missing the "Closed" signs every Tuesday morning at 10:45. Not only are the signs on every door, them suckers are BIG.

On an unrelated note, did you know that there are still people that believe that "A.D." stands for "After Death"? And not just any people, but college students! I thought the only people who believed that were elementary students before their first world history class. Clearly, I was wrong. I have no faith in the future of humanity.

2 comments:

Chocolate Stu said...

You have to keep in mind, a lot of people who are extremely book smart are complete retards when it comes to reality. Maybe those people are our future geniuses, discovering the cure to AIDS and cancer out of their parents' basements....

Kristi Hirschi said...

AD doesn't stand for After Death????? :)

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